A good one!
Thanks to the night-long translation by a good friend, I can post this one:
Billy walks into a bar, and notices a large glass picther filled with $50 bills on the bar. He asks the barman: "Hey, what's up with the glass full of cash? There must be a fortune in there!" The bartender replies: "We have a running bet in here. Whoever pays 50 bucks and performs three tasks, gets to keep the pitcher and all its contents. Keep in mind, they are three very difficult tasks, as you can tell from all the cash."
"And what are the tasks?"
"No, no, first you show me the money, then I tell you the tasks!" So the guy pulls out a 50, and the bartender tells him the tasks:
First, you have to drink a 2 liter pitcher of tequila, all in one go and without spilling a drop.
Second: Out back my pitbull is chained up, and he has a loose tooth. You have to pull it with your hands, without using any tools.
Third: Upstairs is my 80 year old grandmother. She's never had an orgasm in her life! You have to bring her to her first climax ever.
"You're crazy! No one could do that", and Billy puts the 50 in the pitcher.
Somewhat annoyed, Billy downs a few Budweisers, and with the booze he starts feeling brave. He starts to think, a 50 is a 50. And I want the whole lot!
So he slurs to the bartender: "Hey buddy. Wheresh that bottle a' tequila!?" The barman fills the 2 liter glass, and Billy starts to guzzle. He turns red, and tears pour from his eyes, but he polishes it off in one go, without spilling a drop. The bar erupts in applause, and Billy staggers out into the back yard.
Suddenly there is a loud tumult, with howling, growling, and much gnashing of teeth. Then all goes still. The other patrons are sure that Billy has met his match. Then the door opens, and Billy stumbles in, his clothes torn, bleeding, and covered with bites.
After the applause dies down, he yells out: "OK, that's done. So where is this 80 year old grandma with the loose tooth?"
Billy walks into a bar, and notices a large glass picther filled with $50 bills on the bar. He asks the barman: "Hey, what's up with the glass full of cash? There must be a fortune in there!" The bartender replies: "We have a running bet in here. Whoever pays 50 bucks and performs three tasks, gets to keep the pitcher and all its contents. Keep in mind, they are three very difficult tasks, as you can tell from all the cash."
"And what are the tasks?"
"No, no, first you show me the money, then I tell you the tasks!" So the guy pulls out a 50, and the bartender tells him the tasks:
First, you have to drink a 2 liter pitcher of tequila, all in one go and without spilling a drop.
Second: Out back my pitbull is chained up, and he has a loose tooth. You have to pull it with your hands, without using any tools.
Third: Upstairs is my 80 year old grandmother. She's never had an orgasm in her life! You have to bring her to her first climax ever.
"You're crazy! No one could do that", and Billy puts the 50 in the pitcher.
Somewhat annoyed, Billy downs a few Budweisers, and with the booze he starts feeling brave. He starts to think, a 50 is a 50. And I want the whole lot!
So he slurs to the bartender: "Hey buddy. Wheresh that bottle a' tequila!?" The barman fills the 2 liter glass, and Billy starts to guzzle. He turns red, and tears pour from his eyes, but he polishes it off in one go, without spilling a drop. The bar erupts in applause, and Billy staggers out into the back yard.
Suddenly there is a loud tumult, with howling, growling, and much gnashing of teeth. Then all goes still. The other patrons are sure that Billy has met his match. Then the door opens, and Billy stumbles in, his clothes torn, bleeding, and covered with bites.
After the applause dies down, he yells out: "OK, that's done. So where is this 80 year old grandma with the loose tooth?"
posted by Torsten at 9:41 am
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